You Pinspire Me
The last 6 months has been a little ‘up in the air’ for our family. Every decision that we made, starting in November, was made with the preface, “If Brian gets into grad school…”
If Brian gets into grad school, we’re going to have to move or store any of these Christmas presents that we buy for the kids… do we really want to get them THAT?
If Brian gets into grad school, we’re probably going to be selling the house. Do we really want to buy this new light fixture?
If Brian gets into grad school, we’re going to need this extra $25. We’re going to need every extra dollar. Do I really want to get take-out tonight?
I’m not going to lie – living in a state of unknown about the next few years of our life was just a little exhausting!
Then came the interviews, and the waiting (and then more waiting when the response date came & went) and finally, the acceptance into the program. Huzzah!
We put together a very comprehensive spreadsheet that sorted out every living situation that we might encounter.
The very clear conclusion of the spreadsheet was the last. Sell our house. Take a vehicle off the road. Rent a smaller place.
Done. Great! Decision made. But then we had to sell the house. The Hamilton market is hot hot hot right now – and we wanted to get our place listed before everyone else jumped into the spring/summer listing fray. That meant that we had fewer than 30 days to get our house into order. Yikes. Cue anxiety.
We made lists, and we categorized the lists into other lists. We hired a home staging consultant. We obtained paint. We begged friends for help. We nearly lost our minds when we took up the the downstairs bathroom floor and found that the previous owners had done a terrible job with the downstairs bathroom and EVERYTHING was rotten because of it. My mom stepped up and took the kids to her place for the week, and in the span of about 10 days, Brian and I put in well over 300 hours of work between the two of us (not to mention the friends that stepped up to paint, frame, clean, and powerwash). Through it all, we saw the listing day, April 20, creeping closer and closer – until it was 1am on April 20 and the house still wasn’t ready for pictures or showing.
Much work. Such tired. Falling into bed every night trying to convince my husband that we WILL get it done on time, because there is no other option. So. Much. Stress.
Then, when I finally got into the van & drove to my mom’s place to accommodate the 30+ showings that would be that week, I sat down on a couch for the first time in 10 days, and I did nothing but sit. And, of course, pick a little argument with my mom, because, after all, I am still someone’s child, and like all children, I’m kind of a pain in the ass when I’m exhausted and sleep-deprived. Sorry about that, mom.
I spent a week stressing about the showings and about how many people thought that our house needed too much work. What would happen if no one submitted an offer? What if we didn’t get enough to cover all of the expenses that we made just selling the house? What if, what if, what if?
The day of the offer presentations. All the way up until mid afternoon… only 1 registered offer! What if it’s a lowball? What if our approach didn’t work, in spite of the over 60 groups that came in between showings and the open house? What if, what if, what if? And then, a 2nd offer was registered. And then a 3rd. By 10pm, we signed off on our deal, with condition of home inspection. What if the home inspector found something terrible that we didn’t know existed??
Home inspection came, went, and the conditions were lifted.
And now…. we are apartment hunting. We need to have a place to move to when our house closes, but for some reason unbeknownst to me, landlords in Hamilton think that they have the right to discriminate against us because we have two young kids. And a dog. I know that it doesn’t sound good, but for real: We’re nice, wholesome, quiet people! I mean, sure, we’re not as quiet as single professionals who work 60 hours a week, but that doesn’t mean that you can refuse to show us your apartment! It’s ILLEGAL to do that, FYI!
It’s stressful. Our house is sold. I don’t want to move into something that I don’t feel anything about. I don’t want to be homeless.
So much stress in the last few months, and all of it about things over which I have no control. I have put my whole self into this whole process – after you do all that you can do, there is nothing else that you can do. Except be still, and trust.
I believe in God. I know that not every one of you does. I also believe the events of my life are in his hands. And I know that not an ounce of worrying on my part is actually going to change the outcome of any of these situations. When I catch myself getting worked up, my head goes towards the song that my son sings in Sunday School every week:
Be still and know that I Am God,
Be still and know that I Am God.
Be STILL and know that I Am God.
It is what it is. It will be what it will be. Brian has been accepted into his prestigious program. We got our house ready for listing and it looked amazing. We sold the house for 5% over list. We will get an apartment that’s right for our family.
Be still and know.
Jenn vanOosten
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Living with a lot of “what ifs” isn’t fun! I’m terrible in situations like that too. It’s hard not to get caught up in the “what if” game.
Praying for you guys as you start this next adventure!
Good luck. Anything yet?
A GREAT lead, but dependent on a friend of a friend closing a house that she has an offer on – until then, pins & needles!!